We live in a society in which women are constantly seeking more opportunities and taking progressive steps in a number of areas—including in the dating world.
While the traditional expectations were for men to pursue women and eventually ask them out, times and standards have certainly changed. Sure, there’s nothing wrong with letting guys still be the pursuers (and they should pursue you), but it’s also perfectly fine for women to be the ones to ask the guys out, too.
It can definitely be beyond scary to stand in front of the guy you have feelings for and risk your pride and face the possibility of rejection as you muster up the gusto to get the words out of your mouth. You could walk away with a heart full of lovey-eyed emojis or with that same heart shattered into a thousand tiny little pieces.
I’ll never forget the first time I worked up the nerve to ask a guy out. I was terrified at the thought of it. But then I thought about Taylor Swift’s Fearless album (one of the greatest gifts to mankind) and her quote about fearless meaning to be afraid but to jump, anyway. I decided that I needed to jump—I needed to ask him out.
I did, and it turned out that he had a girlfriend, so I walked away with that heartache feeling. But you know what? To this day, I will never regret that moment in my life. In fact, I’ll always be proud of it. I see that moment in my life as a huge growth point for me. I did something bold, and it felt really good to be honest about my feelings with someone who needed to hear them.
I don’t recommend asking out a guy who already has a girlfriend, but I didn’t know that he did. (That’s a story in itself—he had never mentioned her, and we spent a good amount of time together.) But if you’re interested in a guy who you think is interested in you, too, why not take a chance and ask him out? Why do guys always have to be the ones to work up the nerve to risk rejection? It’s probably not always easy for them, either.
No, it might not work out how you dream in your head, but it also might. You’ll never know unless you actually go for it. You don’t have to wait for the guy to be the first one to take a chance—you can be the one to jump first, sister.
Don’t ever let fear hold you back from doing the brave things your heart really wants to do, even when those things scare the heck out of you and make you sweat more than an hour in hot yoga. You’re worth the risk.
And who knows? Maybe he is, too.